写真は口程にものを云う:The photo speaks as much as a mouth

日系人会主催の敬老会。その日担当のエイドさんの代理で、Kさんをお連れした。昼食弁当は特別に著名なシェフが作られたそうで味はピカイチ。やん、食べるのが勿体ない。こうした視覚的にも芸術の域に匹敵する繊細さは、あたしたちの誇るべき食文化なんですね。さて、雨上がりの夕方、お友達のカップルと共に近所のブルックリンカレッジのキャンパスの散策。由緒あるカレッジ図書館にも入って、その充実ぶりに堪能した。そういえば、所用で思わず、生前のオリンが足繁く通ったガン病院の前を通った。何とも言えない想い、、ジワーって涙が出たよ。 さて、イーストビレッジの病院に入院されているKさんの部屋の窓から、素晴らしい虹を見た。帰りがけ、幾人もの人から、あのでっかい虹を見たか?って呼び止められた。虹の良いところは、こんな風に人々の顔を上に向けさせてくれることだね. (微笑)

The lunch box at the Respect for the Aged Party hosted by “JAA/Japanese American Association of New York” was amazing! I thought, “Ah, what a waste” to eat it. Japanese food culture is simply delicate & artistic. Well, one early evening after the rain, I & friends couple went for a walk around the nearby Brooklyn College campus. The inside of the historic college library was once again well-stocked. By the way, the other day, I passed by the New York University Cancer Center, where Orin attended before his death, for the first time in a while. Tears welled up a little. . Now, I went to visit K at the hospital in East Village. We could see a wonderful rainbow from her hospital room. On the way home, I was stopped by several people asked me, “Did you see that amazing rainbow earlier?” The good thing about rainbows is that it makes people look up. (smile)

10月13日は, 神舘美会子(みたち・みえこ)さんとリョウ和田さんの出版記念講演会がJAAで開催された。(このブログでも紹介したお二人共著の『多文化都市ニューヨークを生きる』)たくさん素敵な人々が集まってくださり、異なる視座からの奥の深いスピーチ、同時に視聴者からの質問で時間はあっという間に過ぎていった。ビデオアップまで少々お待ちください。

On October 13th, a publication commemorative lecture by Mieko Mitachi and Ryo wada was held at JAA. (“Living in a Multicultural City of New York” co-authored by the two, which was introduced on this blog) A lot of nice people came together, and the time passed quickly with deep speeches from different perspectives and questions from the audience. Please wait a moment until the video is uploaded.

101枚の絵画展:101 paintings: “101 Scenes from the Land of Color” by Orin Buck

昨日はちょっとしんみりして、ちょっとだけお友達と話して、アタシらの結婚記念日を一人、淡々と祝った。アタシらは世間のお祝いごとに無頓着でもあったから、気が向いた日を”お誕生日”にして祝ってみたり、そんなふうだったので思い返しても薄い記憶しかない。ハイライトっていうのが無いのよ(?!)ただニューバーグでは、オリンの闘病と共にやってきた日々の記憶が詰まっているし、ワインを買ったりお祝いしたことも覚えている。

なんと!!2016年は、仲良くお付き合いのあった画廊のオーナーの提案で、数日とはいえオリンは小品展を開催したのだった。しかも、そのオープニングは10月4日!1日遅れの結婚記念日の最良の贈り物じゃなかったかしら。ありがとう、ありがとう。アタシもオリンも本当に人々には恵まれているのね。再び感謝。

101枚の絵画展 <—ここをクリック

Yesterday I was a little somber, talked a little with some friends, and celebrated my wedding anniversary by myself. We were also indifferent to the celebrations of the world, so we decided to celebrate by making any day we felt like a “birthday or something else”, so even when I look back on it, I only have a vague memory of it. There are no highlights (?!) that I have. However, the years of Newburgh is filled with memories that came with Orin’s battle with his illness, and I also remember buying wine and celebrating together.

Oh my God! In 2016, at the suggestion of the owner of a 128 gallery with whom we have a good relationship, even if it was just a few days, Orin held an exhibition of small art pieces. Moreover, the opening was October 4th! Now I think that it was the best gift for our one-day late wedding anniversary. Thank you thank you. Both I and Orin are truly blessed by people. Thanks again.

101 paintings <—- click

10月3日はアタシとオリンの結婚記念日です:October 3rd is my and Orin’s wedding anniversary

2011年、早朝からニューヨーク市役所に出向き、丸一日かけて入籍手続きは無事終了。それまで何年もずっと一緒に暮らしていたし、今更?って、何だか姉さん女房としては初婚のオリンに気恥ずかしかったなあ。

マンハッタンでも、ビスビー(アリゾナ)でも、ニューバーグでも、ほぼ、毎日一回は見知らぬ人から声をかけられた。『まあ、なんて可愛い仲良しカップルなの!』って。オリンは今はアタシの心の世界に住んでいて、二人ちゃっかり相変わらず仲良く出かけているんだよね。そうした気配を感じる人もいて、いろんな人ににっこり笑顔で挨拶される。

In 2011, we went to New York City Hall early in the morning. The marriage registration procedure was completed successfully over the course of a whole day. We had been living together for many years up until then, so now? As an older wife, I felt a bit embarrassed by Orin’s first marriage.

In New York City, Bisbee (Arizona), and Newburgh, we were approached by a stranger almost every day. “What a cute and lovely couple! ” Orin is currently living in the world of my heart, and the two of us go out together as usual. There are some people who can see my inside like this way, and I am greeted with a warm smile by many people.

オリン大喜び、えみちゃんありがとう:Orin is very happy, thank you Emi-chan

えみちゃんが車で、あたしをロバート・モセス・ステートパークに連れて行ってくれた! 海で泳いでバーベキューも、と楽しい計画。途中、ファーマーズマーケットで野菜も仕入れ、いえいー!

ところで、出がけの一瞬に不思議なことがあった。ご存知のように、シートベルトは当然ある重量のかかった座席のセンサーがそれを認知し、ベルト装着を促す警告灯〜警告音を発する、のですが誰もいない後部座席なのよ。。これじゃあ、あたし達は出発できない!? それで、空っぽの座席のシートベルトを試しに装着した途端、全てOK。オリンにも所縁のあるロングビーチ〜ジョンズビーチ〜ファイアー・アイランド、オリンは絶対に同行したかったのだろう。えみちゃん共々納得。

沖をハリケーンが北上している関係で驚きの高波!オリンの灰を撒く。瞬く間に荒ぶる波がオリンを持ってゆく。これまでも数回に渡って海辺に撒いてきたけど、これで、、課題のひとつを完全に終えた。海は全てオリンになったよ。思わずこのような素晴らしい日をプレゼントしてくれたえみちゃんに心から感謝。

Emi-chan took me to Robert Moses State Park by car! A fun plan to swim in the sea and have a BBQ. On the way, we bought some fresh vegetables at the farmers market, which was great! Yey!

By the way, a strange thing happened in the moment we set out. As you know, seat belts naturally have a sensor on the seat that has a certain weight on them, which recognizes this and emits a warning light or sound to remind you to fasten your belt. But there was no one in the back seat. . If this happens, we can’t leave! ? So, as soon as I tried putting on the seat belt on an empty seat. Everything was fine. Orin definitely wanted to accompany him to Long Beach, Jones Beach, and Fire Island, which he also has connections to. Emi and I both agree.

Surprising high waves due to a hurricane heading north off the coast! Scatter Orin’s ashes, in the moment, the raging waves carry Orin away. I have sprinkled his ashes on the beach several times so far, but now I have completely finished one of my tasks. The entire ocean has become Orin. I would like to thank Emi-chan with all of my heart for giving me(and Orin) such a wonderful day.

引越しを決めたり、9月中旬のお出かけとか:Deciding to move and/or going out in mid-September

不思議なご縁とタイミングで、4年経ってキューガーデンに引っ越しの運び。日の当たる場所に移ろうねーと、オリンの魂に誓ったその数時間後の出来事。今、あたしが居る地下室はオリンの機材の整頓で必要だったんだろう、広さがあったものね。ほぼクリアにして来たので、次に進みなさい!と背中を押されたのかな。

By a strange coincidence and timing, I decided to move to Kew Gardens in Queens after 4 years.
This happened a few hours after I vowed to Orin’s soul to move to a place where the sun shines.
The basement I’m in now was probably needed to organize Orin’s equipment, and it was spacious.
Now that it’s almost clear, let’s move on! I guess he pushed me on the back.

マット、デビッドと共に『赤い鳥小鳥』パフォーマンス:“Red Bird Little Bird” performance with Matt and David

ここニューヨークで野口整体、そして活元をご指導くださった鈴木桜さんの5回目の命日。9月13日、懸念した雨も降らず柔かな薄日は、謙虚で穏やかな彼女の優しい人柄そのもの。

This is the 5th anniversary of the death of Sakura Suzuki, who taught Noguchi Chiropractic and Katsugen here in New York. On September 13th, there was no rain and it was a calm day, reflecting her humble, gentle personality.

諦めか、受容か。全ては夢幻?:Should I give up or accept it? Is it all a dream? My grieving process. 

Tちゃんとのパフォーマンスの打ち合わせに出る。時間があったのでポート・オーソリティ・バスターミナルに向かう。この日曜日の忙しい時間帯、あり得ないんだけど、誰もいないゲートは異空間そのもの。ニューバーグでの3年間、ここは、Ο君とアタシが頻繁に利用したバス・ターミナル。もちろん、O君の治療や検査が主要事項だったけど、買い物や買い食いしたり、友人にちょこっと会ったり、帰りの座席の確保で早々と列に並んだり、。。。かつてO君は確かに居た・今はもう居ない、このあまりにも明白で唯一の絶対的現実は、アタシの世界観を変えてしまった。居ようが居まいが今ここ、この刹那の瞬間が全てなんだ。あたしの現実に折り合いを付けるんだよ。”有難う、いつも一緒だよ〜” がアタシとOの仮想現実の合言葉。こんな風に唱えると、なんとも言えない暖かさ、人智を超えた”愛”を感知する。

I went to a meeting with T-chan. (We’re going to do performance) Since I had time, I headed to the Port Authority Bus Terminal. Unusually at this busy time on a Sunday, but the empty gate feels like a different world.

During our three years & 3 months in Newburgh, this was the bus terminal that O and I used frequently. Of course, O’s treatments and tests/exams were the main focus, but there was also shopping, eating, briefly meeting friends, and lining up early to secure a seat. . .

O-kun was once there, but now he’s no longer here. This very clear, and only absolute reality has changed my inner worldview. Whether I’m here or not, this moment here and now is everything. I have to come to terms with my reality. “Thank you, we’ll always be together~” is the password of me and O in virtual reality. When I chant it like this, I feel an indescribable warmth, a love that goes beyond human comprehension.

珍しくだあれも居ない、だあれも並んでない:Unusually, no one is there, no one is lining up.

出版記念講演会の打ち合わせということで、アタシとM子さんはロングアイランドのR氏宅に出かけた。ところで、O君の他界からこっち、もう半年も ”私たちのホンちゃん” をR氏に預けっぱなし。ホンタは、くつろいで伸び伸びしているように見えたし、アタシはちょいと(いつもなんですが)泣いてしまった。でも、思い切って再会を果たしたので心の底から吹っ切れた。あの時のホンタはもう過去形。優しい人に気に入られて、幸せな養子に出てね〜、って思う。

Ahead of the publication commemorative lecture, I and Ms. M went to Mr. R’s house on Bay Shore. By the way, Mr. R has been taking care of “our Hon-chan(our car once)” for half a year now since O passed away. Honta seemed relaxed and peaceful, and I was so nostalgic that I cried a little. However, since we achieved our long-awaited reunion、I was able to break free from my obsession with the fun memories of Honta, O, and me. Honta at that time is already in the past tense. I hope that he will be liked by a kind person and be adopted happily.

帰る途中、R氏の案内でアタシたちは海風を堪能し、O君の灰も撒いてきた。少し遠いけど、ファイヤー・アイランドも灯台も見える。このところ、O君と居たアタシ、をなぞりながら、O君の居ないアタシ、に日常を変換。少しずつ、少しずつ。〜〜このアタシの時空間を共有してくださる万物に感謝。

On the way back, Mr. R guided us and we enjoyed the sea breeze, and I also scattered O’s ashes. Although it’s a little far away, you can see Fire Island and the lighthouse. Lately, I’ve been tracing the person I was with O and transforming my daily life into the person I am without O. Little by little, little by little. ~~Thank you to all things that share this time and space with me.

8月下旬からこっちを、写真日記風にしてみた:From the end of August until now, I made this a photo diary style  

月命日も6回目:6th month of anniversary of death

オリンちゃんは緊急搬送されたこの病院で、最後の数日を過ごした。残ったあたしは、周期的に図書館帰りにここに立ち寄って、折々の心模様をのぞいてみる。オリンはもう居ない、彼の魂・エネルギー波動は、ただ一つの超意識になっている。そして、あたしを包み込んでくれているので、安心して前に進んで行ける。

Orin spent his final days in this hospital where he was rushed to emergency. Since then, I surely stop by here on my way home from the library and find out how my emotion has been moving. Orin is no more, his soul/energy wave has become a single superconscious. And because he is wrapping me up, so that is why I can move forward with peace of mind.

マットとリズの美味しいご飯、食材はほぼ彼らの庭で収穫したもの。花も見事に咲き誇っているね。

Delicious foods from Matt and Liz, mostly harvested from their own garden. The flowers are blooming beautifully too.

美味しい、美味しい!: Delicious, delicious! yummy yummy!
彼らのハウスの瞑想ルームに、オリンの絵が掛かっている : A painting of Orin hangs in the meditation room of their house.
Oさんの月命日、8月25日。マッサージセラピースタジオにて: O’s death anniversary, August 25th. At the massage therapy studio

空也上人、それと、あたしが昔見た夢の話:”Kuya Shonin”, and the story of a dream I had a long time ago

世界に誇る日本の仏像たち、有名・無名、時代背景も作者も技法も問わず、あたしの中でその生き様、そして視覚的にも心の深奥にも触れて、尚且つ越えるものがない、という理由から、”空也上人立像” を真っ先に挙げる。

ひたすら「南無阿弥陀仏」と口で称える称名念仏(口称念仏)を日本において記録上初めて実践したとされ、日本における浄土教念仏信仰の先駆者と評価される ~~~~~ 特徴的な空也像の由来は、彼が「南無阿弥陀仏」の6文字を唱えると、阿弥陀如来の姿に変わったという伝承を表している。

空也-wikipedia から抜粋 <—- クリックして詳細をご覧ください

A statue of the Buddhist monk Kuya is known for having small statues of Buddhas emerging from his mouth. ~~~ The six Buddha statues represent Amitabha Buddha. Kuya was known for his tireless efforts to teach Buddhism by chanting, “I take refuge in Amitabha Buddha.” Kuya was active in the middle of the Heian period (794 to late 12th century) amid rampant plagues and a series of events such as earthquakes, flooding and uprisings by Taira no Masakado and Fujiwara no Sumitomo. The disasters especially afflicted the common people.

The Buddhist monk helped the poor and sick throughout his life, earning him the nickname “Ichi no Hijiri,” a saint living among the ordinary people. The standing statue, believed to be from the early Kamakura period (late 12th century to 1333), is only 117 centimeters tall, but its muscular appearance in a simple outfit so overwhelms many viewers that they cannot help but feel like standing straighter before it. ~~~~ by The Yomiuri Shimbun / 11:00 JST, April 13, 2022

どこかに書いたかもだけど、昔々途方もなく素晴らしい夢を見た。障子越しに明るい日の差し込む何十畳敷きの畳の部屋にあたしたちは座っている。程なく障子が開き、老人がニコニコしながら入ってきた。見ると両手に限りない虫かご(?)を引っ張っている。正確には、虫かご のコーナーには紐がついており、老人はその紐の束を引きずりながら入ってきた、そして、顔をあたし達に、つまり対面(正面)姿勢でゆっくりと座るとあたし達に語り始めた。

『みなさんが、何か良い行いや、良い言葉を出すと、それはみなさんの口から蝶々になって飛び出します。その蝶々をこれらの虫かごに採集するのが私の役目(?仕事?)なのです。』

それだけ。ただ、それだけ。その夢のあとに、何かのきっかけで”空也上人像”を知った。声帯を通しての、この世界への神性の出現。言霊が、この現象界で変身するのだとしたら何ともシンボリックな見せ方ではないかしら!

I may have written it somewhere, but once upon a time, I had an incredibly wonderful dream; We are sitting in a tatami room with dozens of tatami mats where the sun shines through the shoji/paper screens. Before long, the shoji doors opened, and an old man entered with a smile on his face. He looks like he’s pulling an endless bug cage (?) in his hands. To be more precise, the insect cage has a string attached to the corner, and the old man came in while dragging a bundle of the string, and when he sat face to face with us, he sat down slowly, started talking to us.

『Whenever you do a good deed or say a good word, it will fly out of your mouth like a butterfly. My duty ( mission ?) is to collect the butterflies in these insect cages. 』

That’s all. Just that. After that dream, for some reason, I learned about the statue of Kuya Shonin. The manifestation of divinity into the world through the vocal cords. If Kotodama(spirit of words) transforms in this phenomenal world, isn’t it a very symbolic way of showing it?